Jonathan GibsonIt’s quiet now.
The streets are littered with the tattered remains of discarded tutus and spilled glitter paint. Across the Grove, a girl sits clutching a crumpled piece of paper; she talks to an unknown voice on the phone.
“It’s the wrong one, mom. They weren’t supposed to pick me.”
Two men in matching navy blazers, their brass buttons twinkling in the afternoon sun, solemnly exchange fist bumps.
A white pickup truck drives slowly along Sorority Row. A man with furrowed brows and weathered skin walks alongside it, bending down to pick up each noisemaker, Solo cup and piece of confetti tossed into the air by the raving masses that flooded the streets just hours before.
*Sigh*
“I’m too old for this,” he says.
As the sun sets and another Bid Day is tucked away in the history books of Ole Miss, some young men and women are left to wonder what comes next.
Others will be overwhelmed by the fact that their family tree has suddenly gained 700 more branches overnight. Lucky for them, Ole Miss has a great landscaping team.
No matter what feelings you have, if you made it through rush, you’ll need a guide to help you survive these post-Bid Day times. Otherwise, you might find yourself being eaten alive by wild bears or attacked by masked crusaders in cars made from junkyard scraps.
Wait, no, sorry — that’s “Mad Max.”
Didn’t rush? This guide is for you, too.
If you’ve been wondering where your friends went this past week, they’re still alive, and they’re finally free to go see that movie or grab some dinner at the Union. Maybe. They might just be avoiding you. Who knows?
Don’t get confused if they start talking about parties you weren’t at or they send you texts asking you to buy tickets to some event with puppies, pancakes or small children. It’s all part of the experience.
Parking might still be a nightmare, but at least now your chances of finding a spot near the Tad Pad or by the Turner Center are 10 times higher.
If you survived rush, here’s what comes next for you:
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- When you’ve caught your breath from that exciting run to your new home, take some time to carb up. This is the moment — the thing you’ve been looking forward to all of rush. The food at these houses is the envy of literally every person on campus. Get an extra scoop of macaroni and cheese and get ready to never be unsatisfied with your lunch again.
- If you thought you’d already taken more pictures than humanly possible, think again. They never stop. Get one from this angle. No, THIS angle. OK, now a funny one. OK, line up by height. No, in reverse order. By birthday. Find someone you don’t know. Let’s do a jumping one. Wait, sorry, my flash wasn’t on. Can you get one with my phone?
- Moms, dads, if you’re reading this, please go home. We will send you the pictures tomorrow. Yes, we can help you get them on Facebook. Yes, we’ll call. Yes, we’re having fun. We have to go mingle with our new brothers/sisters, and the upperclassmen are totally judging us right now.
- If you don’t have a monogrammed planner yet, you’re going to need to get one yesterday. Your schedule is about to be filled with more mandatory events than your Erin Condren calendar can fit on its special add-on mandatory event booklet that you got for SUCH a good deal. But seriously, keep track of these meetings, date parties and other gatherings because not only are they required, but you’ll also miss out on important bonding time with new potential friends if you try to skip out. One of these mandatory events you’ll soon learn to love is your weekly chapter meeting. Even if you have no idea what you’re voting on, what events you’re planning or what chapter executives you’re hearing talk, you’ll love learning all the intricacies of house politics and growing closer to all your new friends.
New members, these are your glory days. This is your chance to finally release all the anxieties that rush might have filled you with. You’re like Will Smith in “I Am Legend,” except without the zombies and explosions and with more glitter, and you make it until the end credits.
Take a deep breath and get ready for the best days of your life. Bump some fists, snap some selfies and rest easy knowing you still have a few weeks to ask your parents for the money to pay your dues.
