College football pick ’em

Hey, y’all! it’s week eight, and you’re back because we’ve proved that we know what we’re talking about when it comes to collegiate American football stuff. We spend 45-plus hours a week meticulously researching statistics and analytics that give us the advantage. We’re the closest thing  you’re going to get to Buff getting that sports almanac in “Back to the Future,” so buckle up, buster.

No. 9 Florida (-5.0) at South Carolina O/U 47

Joshua: I’m pretty sure I’ve picked against Florida every time they’ve showed up. (I’m too lazy to go back and check.) I think it’s time to give the Gators a gander this week. South Carolina showed a valiant effort in their upset over Georgia last week, but inexperience at quarterback might be too much for the Gamecocks to overcome. Keep chompin’, Gators.

Erin: This is going to be the only educated pick I make this round, so cherish it. After the Gamecocks’ double overtime win over Georgia, I can’t help but think that wrestling these Gators will be a piece of cake. Steve Irwin, is that you? USC has it.

No. 2 LSU (-18.5) at Mississippi State O/U 61.5

Joshua: There’s trap-game potential here as the Tigers are coming off an impressive 42-28 win over No. 9 Florida and face No. 11 Auburn next week, but the Bulldogs are bad. Not only did they get beat by a bottom-feeding Tennessee team, they looked awful doing it.

Erin: Ew. Between corn dogs and cowbells, I don’t think I can even bring myself to discussing either without gagging. I mean, like, LSU will probably win, so can we just move on, please? 

No. 12 Oregon (-3.0) at No. 25 Washington O/U 50

Joshua: Time for some good ole rock-em-sock-em West Coast football. While I always look for an opportunity to bet against those ugly Oregon Duck uniforms (pick one and get the job done, gentlemen), I’ve got to take the big O right here with the under. The Duck defense shines in this one against Jacob Eason.

Erin: So my rival high school’s colors were purple and gold, and for that reason and that reason only, I’m picking Oregon. 

No. 16 Michigan at No. 7 Penn State (-9.0) O/U 47

Joshua: Shea’s all-denim fit is going to stick out like a sore thumb in this game’s White Out. What makes you think you can roll into Happy Valley and grab a win if you can’t even get into Round Table? Patterson throws two picks in a statement win for the Nittany Lions. 

Erin: Do you even have to ask?

Texas A&M (-6.5) at Ole Miss O/U 55.5

Joshua: It’s a make-or-break game for the Rebels as the Aggies stumble into Vaught-Hemingway. Texas A&M got clapped by Alabama last week as Ole Miss pulled the old Plaxico Burress multiple times at Mizzou. The Aggies pull ahead with a few scores early as the Rebels deal with some targeting suspensions along the defensive front, and the Rebels run-heavy offense isn’t designed to comeback from a deficit. Aggies cover.

Erin: I’m trying to forget last weekend, where I spent my Friday and Saturday in Columbia, getting cursed at by people dressed in yellow-and-black hoodies and cargo shorts. To make matters worse, the Rebels let me down, and I had to do a walk of shame all the way back to Oxford. I’m chalking that loss up to being so far from home, so now that we’re back in Oxford, I have full confidence in the Rebels to come through. Your 12th man can’t help you here, Aggies. Rebs by 90. Cheers!

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